


The Magical Adventure of Cosmo and Danny Phantom

by spacefrog



Category: Danny Phantom, Fairly OddParents
Genre: Crack Crossover, Crossover, Crossover Pairings, Death, M/M, Miscarriage, Murder, and not in a sexy way, destruction of an entire town, don't take this seriously, due to dick in throat, due to sex, its got some missed up shit later on, its kinda gross tbh, suffocation, this is pure shitposting, warning tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-08-10
Packaged: 2018-07-27 14:06:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7621315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacefrog/pseuds/spacefrog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Devastated after catching Wanda cheating on him, Cosmo flys away only to bump into a mysterious white haired teen. Will it bring his salvation or destruction?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First Encounter

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be real, I wrote this in like tenth grade to challenge myself to write the worst fanfic ever. While I highly doubt anything can surpass the true art work of My Immortal, I hope this work can inspire other people to look at this and say out loud "What is this shit?"

It ‘twas a cold day in Townsville. It was raining and snowing. Timmy Turner was busy nailing Wanda into his bed.  
“Ohhh!!!!!11!” she groaned beneath Timmy’s prepubescent body. Fairies had no shame in pedophilia apparently.  
“Hey Timmy I’m- “  
Wanda and Timmy gasped in shock! It was Cosmo!  
Cosmo’s eyes widened in shock.  
Suddenly, tears burst from his eyes.  
“Wanda, you whore!” he shrieked as he flew away!  
Timmy and Wanda shrugged and continued their dirty deed.

Meanwhile, Danny Phantom was making his rounds about town. His eyes watered from accidently catching Box Ghost and Lunch Lady getting it on. He had been unable to bleach from his mind how Box Ghost’s body rolls had been nearly suffocating the Lunch Lady while she went down on him.  
Lost in thought, Danny collided with a mass of green hair and green eyes (just like his!). Falling through the air the two twirled in a kaleidoscope of white and green. With a pained gasp, both members opened their eyes, Danny because he felt a soft body beneath his own, and Cosmo because he felt some killer muscle.  
When Cosmos opened his tear-filled eyes, he was shocked to see eyes that mirrored his own in color. These other eyes seemed dazed, blinking slowly. Cosmo found himself getting lost in these eyes. They were so beautiful, much more beautiful than that whore Wanda’s. At this thought, Cosmo felt his eyes water, and water burst out like a hose from his eyes. This brought alertness to the body above him, which then moved off of him. Cosmo found himself missing the strong muscles that were pressed against him. Cosmo blushed a deep red when he had this thought as with it came a deep desire to have his way with this teen in front of him.  
“Are you alright?” came the teen’s voice. Cosmo was suddenly overcome with shyness at the younger -but taller- boy’s inquire. He merely nodded in reply. This of course worried the teen  
“I think I’ll check that out for myself. Oh yeah, I’m Danny Phantom.” Danny extended a well-toned arm. Cosmo took Danny’s hand and shook it.  
“I’m Cosmo.” He replied.  
“Well then, follow me.” Danny said as he went up into the air.  
And who was Cosmo to disagree? Because yo Danny Phantom was just fourteen, but he had the tightest buttocks Cosmo had ever seen.


	2. AnD THEN THEY HOOKED UP

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danny and Cosmo share personal feelings, leading to-???!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forgive me father for I have sinned.

After a brief flight, Danny and Cosmo reached the Fenton household. Danny went through the walls and unlocked the window to his room, letting Cosmo in. Cosmo was greeted with the sight of a small, slightly messy room. It reminded him of Timmy, sending a pain though his heart at the thought. Oh, what a betrayal! His own wife cheating on him with an elementary school kid! It was worse than the time he was told the glory hole in the men’s bathroom served popsicles. It didn’t. It had taken two bottles of mouth wash away the taste and another to drink away the memories.  
Tears began to swell in Cosmo’s eyes at the image of Timmy on top of his wife and also the fact he managed to accidently end up with male genitalia in his mouth. This, of course, alerted Danny.  
“What’s wrong Cosmo?” he asked, eyebrows knotted in worry.  
In that moment, Cosmo locked eyes with Danny. Lost in those green eyes that glowed with unearthly power, the floodgate to Cosmo’s emotions erupted and he gripped Danny closer, tears running down his cheeks and wetting Danny’s shoulder.  
“I caught my wife being plowed by another!” Cosmo wept loudly.  
Danny knew how that felt all too well. He had walked in on Sam in the locker room receiving more sausage than a deli on delivery day. He rubbed Cosmo’s back gently.  
“It’s alright.” Danny whispered into Cosmo’s ear. “I know how that feels.”  
“R-really?” Cosmo asked, tilting his head back and looking Danny straight in the eye as heterosexually two mean could in a situation like that.  
“Yes, really.” Danny smiled. “Do you have anything you’d want me to check by the way? I collided with you pretty hard back there.”  
At this show of concern, Cosmo turned hot all over. Wanda had never looked at him this intensely. Oh! But what would Wanda thin-  
Oh yeah, she was probably still screwing Timmy in the Turner household. That too care of the morals about adultery AND pedophilia n one shot, With this in mind, Cosmo licked his lips, cheeks turning pink.  
“Right here…” Cosmo whispered, hand placed on his chest.  
Danny’s eyes widened and he gulped. Gently, he gripped the bottom edge of Cosmo’s shirt, pulling it up to reveal six erect nipples. Danny and Cosmo locked eyes, desire flooding both of their bodies. Their lips joined together for a chaste kiss and tHEN THEY DID THE SEX!!!!  
“Ooooooh~!” Cosmo groaned. But then suddenly, Danny came with a ghostly wail! It went for miles, shaking the ground, collapsing several buildings and no doubt causing millions in property damage to occur.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This shit finally ends in a hella messed up way. If you finish reading through this you're a real trooper and I salute you. Btw, all those tagged warnings apply so be prepared.

Danny and Cosmo laid down basking in the afterglow, oblivious to the circle of destruction that surrounded them. They locked eyes again, goofy smiles on their faces. Suddenly, Danny got a wider smile on his face.  
“What is it Danny?” Cosmo asked nervously. He may have only known Danny for about forty minutes, but he had never seen him have such a facial expression as the one he currently wore.  
“You know how your wife cheated on you?” Danny said with his grin not diminishing.  
“Yeah…” Cosmo answered in a confused tone. Why was Danny asking this now, especially after they just humped like 2d rabbits?  
“Well,” Danny giggled, “I know how to get you revenge.”  
“REALLY?!!” Cosmo replied with glee.  
“Yes.” Smirked Danny as he leaned close to Cosmo, whispering his ideas into Cosmo’s ear.  
Cosmo chuckled as he listened.

Back at the Turner household, Timmy and Wanda laid in bed, both puffing on the end of a cigarette. Both were as naked as the day they were born. Minus the blood and other bodily fluids associated with birth.  
Suddenly, the walls around them began to tremble slightly. They ignored it, thinking it was aftershocks from the previous earthquake. However, soon the trembling got worse and Timmy and Wanda clutched each other tightly. Timmy probably would have gotten a boner from that had the situation been not as bad.  
Suddenly… the roof flew high up, off the house! It had stopped raining and snowing and sunlight bathed Timmy’s and Wanda’s bodies as if trying to purify the room. It could not, however, erase the events that had occurred, instead causing pink handcuffs to glint accusingly. Timmy and Wanda shivered slightly. Then… Cosmo and Danny flew in!  
“Cosmo?!!” Timmy and Wanda shrieked in terror as Cosmo had on the look of a man that had not only crossed the line but had jumped over it. He made a sudden movement towards Timmy. Wanda moved in front to protect him, but instead Cosmo grabbed her, throwing her crotch onto Timmy’s nose, breaking it.  
“That was for the time you made me drink your pee!!!” Cosmo howled.  
“Cosmo,” Wanda whimpered as she nursed her boy toy. “That was an accident. And it wasn’t just you. All of Fairy World drank Timmy’s pee.”  
Instead of putting out Cosmo’s rage, her words only put Cosmo’s attention on her.  
“Wanda you whore!!!” Cosmo shouted in fury, karate chopping Wanda’s vagina in half.  
In that moment, and unborn fetus slid out. Wanda had been… PREGNANT!  
“My baby! My baby!” Wanda cried, tears going down her face, mascara smearing.  
“Holy moly, Cosmo! You just gave her an abortion!” Danny cried, amazed at his lover and slightly aroused.  
Cosmo merely giggled at Wanda’s misery and Timmy’s look of horror. Seeing as how they were both busy, Cosmo turned towards Danny, capturing his lips. They began to make out right in front of Timmy and Wanda.  
“Oh my gosh, you’re GAY?!!” Timmy exclaimed while trying to fix his broken nose.  
“Disgusting!” Wanda declared homophobicly.

That had been the last straw. Danny and Cosmo rose up in the air, about to execute the final part of their plan. Cosmo took out his wand. Arm extended, he declared “Wanda, for breaking my heart, I’ll break yours!”  
At that moment, a terrible pain came upon Wanda as her body began to tear right down the middle! She would have screamed but she was unable to as her lungs and vocal cords split apart, creating a horrible bloody mess on the carpet below. Timmy cried.  
Using his ghostly powers, Danny quickly grabbed up all of Wanda’s remains and the dead fetus, donating it to the local animal shelter to use as feed because while he was now a murderer, he wasn’t heartless. He quickly returned to see the rest of the show.

When he returned, Timmy was cowering in the corner being taunted by Cosmo.  
“Bucktoothed loser! Big baby! Tiny Penis!” Cosmo cried, waving his wand towards Timmy.  
When Cosmo saw Danny return, he left Timmy to embrace his lover. He then, now knowing he had an audience, returned to Timmy. Timmy shuddered, awaiting his fate.  
Grinning wildly, Cosmo quietly pondered what to do with Timmy. He couldn’t kill Timmy, no, that would cause too many problems. Suddenly, a thought came into Cosmo’s mind, causing his mouth to stretch even wider.

Grip tightening on his wand, Cosmo shot out an ethereal blue light that surrounded Timmy genitals. Timmy continued to cry, but now out of true pain as his manhood was slowly ripped from his body.  
“Now you can never screw another man’s wife again!” Cosmo cackled as he took the genitals and shoved it down Timmy’s throat. “Now choke on it!”  
Timmy hacked and hacked. He may have survived if he had given a blowjob before. Alas, he had been entirely heterosexual his entire life. As his life flashed before his eyes he saw many of his great adventures and many nights longing for girls and just as many nights with his hand for company. Giving out one last hack, he died.

Cosmo clicked his tongue in disappointment. He didn’t actually mean to kill Timmy. He let out a sigh. It was too late now. But, it was alright, Cosmo mused. He had his wonderful ghostly lover now. He zapped onto Timmy’s computer a history of self-fellatio porn videos and fluttered up to Danny, embracing him gently.  
Danny cupped Cosmo’s chin, lifting his head so their eyes met. “Want to go back to my place?” Danny whispered into Cosmo’s ear. Cosmo shivered in delight and nodded.

They got up and flew leisurely back to the Fenton household, lost within each other’s presence. Finally getting there, they cuddled on Danny’s bed, relaxing after all their hard work.  
“I’m going to take a shower.” Danny declared as he got up and stretched. “Want to come with me?” He asked, wiggling his eyebrows at Cosmo.  
Quickly sitting up, Cosmo followed Danny, stripping as he went. When he got into the bathroom, Cosmo was about to embrace Danny when suddenly a white ring encircled Danny’ waist and then one ring went up and another down, revealing a head of black hair and pale blue eyes.  
“WTF!” Cosmo screamed.  
“What?” Danny asked. “I have to get clean at some point. Of course, we can still have fun before I do.”  
“I thought you were a ghost!” Cosmo shrieked.  
“Hehe. Well, I never said that. You assumed. I’m just half-ghost.” Danny said sheepishly. He went to give Cosmo a hug, but Cosmo jumped away.  
“Don’t touch me you deceiver!” Cosmo yelled.  
Crying, Cosmo leapt out of the window, never to be seen by Danny again and only to be found naked in strip clubs.  
Danny cried.


End file.
